Wanting to "Just Quit" J-O-B-S

I happened to catch a documentary on PBS last week called Set For Life by Tree of Life Productions.

It was about folks in middle age devastated by this last economic recession.

As I watched I thought there could be a documentary/a play/something artsy of sorts about folks worldwide who are miserable in made-up j-o-b-s they want to “Just Quit”.

Something tells me this journalist might be able to help me or know someone who will find useful the 9,500 stories from 126 countries I have been curating for the past four years.

I keep this blog going because I remember the pain of being in a job I wanted to “Just Quit” and feeling that no one understood. Folks need to know they are not alone and they aren’t crazy, so today is the day I take the time to pull together the survey results and send an email to the journalist to get some feedback. Taking another step…

 

 

 

New Business? Trust Yourself.

Shout out to the entrepreneurs.  Bigger what’s up to those doing it while working full-time. What a fabulous learning experience this is.

Learning about wearing all the hats from sweeping the floor to paying the bills. Learning about realizing at the end of the day; it’s all me. All I think about is that my father built a successful business and had a full-time job, 6 kids, a 1 acre farm to tend to, and a wife who was sick all the time.  I think about that and it baffles my mind.  It’s deep.  It motivates me.

Learning that your vision only does become clear when you look inside.  There is way too much going on around you to get a clear image of the long view.

Learning that you have to put your ear to the ground and listen to what’s happening around you but you can’t be sidetracked by any of it.  The lessons I’m learning from attending the community meetings is like opening a door, looking inside and realizing that what I see is not what it is.  I can’t take any of it at face value. The only way I’m going to figure out what is “really going on”  is to give it time.

Learning that the risk is real. It’s more a risk in doing something just for the sake of doing something.  That’s a lot of wasted energy . If you’re in it for the long run you have to pace yourself and not jump or panic, it’s about preparing.

Learning that when you are on the path meant for you, synchronicity will come daily & you’ll know when it’s happening. It happened for me one day when I re-worked an art piece the moment I walked in the shop and someone came in a brought it that day.  They had to have it.  It happened again this weekend when two neighborhood people (James and Nicole) came in the shop at the same time.  They  are two people who are like the “real people” my mother use to invite into our home at 1215.  I like them.  I like that they come in the shop.  Can they buy anything?  Nope.  They can’t afford it.   I’m just happy I have a place they feel comfortable coming in.  Love that.

Learning that what I thought the shop was about, ain’t it.  It’s something else.  Much bigger. So big all I can do is go in meditation about it and ask for further direction and guidance…”like really…this is what you want me to do?”…and slowly but surely it’s unfolding. Back to feeling like I’m guided by an invisible hand and I just have to go with it.  I won’t be able to get away from who I am, what I know, all my experiences, where I’m from, because it’s all linking up.

Being a learner is one of my strengths…I’m truly enjoying this ride.

So to those who want to start a business or those in the midst of a start-up…go slow, pace yourself, listen to your intuition and have no regrets.

Running A Brick and Mortar Business

Learning

• How can this be anything but a learning opportunity, if you’ve never done it before?  What I’ve learned:
• Turning the OPEN” sign on means absolutely nothing.  If it’s not Wal-Mart or a good restaurant, there aren’t going to be people waiting to come in.
• As the owner you have to focus early on…figure out the mission…stay focused on the vision.  If products and services don’t line up with the mission and vision don’t do it just to be doing something.  My vision is to create a space like a “barbershop” for creatives.  A place for the community to come, be productive and creative.
• You have to block out the noise all around you.  Meditation has served me well.  
• The location of your business is important but not as important as the products and services you offer.  I’m on a main road in town, but I’d need some outdoor event or product displayed to get people going 45 miles per hour to stop and notice.
• When I stay focused on where I was when I was “wishing” I was home, “wishing” I had a space for my art, “wishing” I was a business owner is the best place for me to draw from. When you are in the REALITY of owning a business and just focusing on all the hard work you can lose the excitement if you focus just on the REALITY of the day. You have to stay grounded in the fact that your “wish”, your “dream” it CAME TRUE. Don’t let up on THAT reality, because many people won’t have the opportunity to know what this feels like.

People

• People who are benefactors have always shown up in my life when I needed them.  Now is no different.  It’s people who have been business owners, are business owners that are giving me tips and ideas.  Giving me contacts and planting seeds.  Gotta love those people and now that I have the business ownership experience (especially retail)  I get it.  If you’ve never done this…you don’t know…but you don’t know you don’t know.
• Struggling people. Many people are deeply in the struggle. “Life’s a struggle”.  They can’t see or hear non-struggle talk.  I get it.  I’ve been there in the struggle mindset, but I don’t feel like life’s a struggle anymore…and it isn’t. I read a bumper sticker the other day….Don’t delay your joy….I loved that.
• People waiting.  Waiting to see how things turn out.  Hopeful for me, but not willing to help or support, just watching and waiting.
• People supporting.  Doing more than asking but following up.  Showing up.  I think about these people and wonder if they know that I ALREADY know what this venture will be.  I don’t know HOW it will get there, or even WHEN, but I can see it morphing like compound interest….slowly then WOW.   I’m actually enjoying this down time, feeling like “I’ve got space to breathe”, solitude in the space, making it my space, getting out the kinks.  It’s not going to last, this place is going to be busy, full of people.  It will be like the “barbershop” or all the people just showing up to my house at 1215 when I was growing up…it was “The Richardson’s”.  Bringing that back.

Planning

• This is the first business idea that I did not do A BUNCH of PAPER PLANNING for. Good thing because it would have been a waste of time.
• Now that I’ve been in it for a couple of months I have a better idea of what I want to do/need to do.  First thing I need is HELP.  I’m going to try to get summer help (possible with a program for Newport News youths) to help with:

Marketing

• Canvassing the community with information about the shop and what we offer
• Website Development – Research WordPress templates, populate website and mobile
• Social Media Management – Facebook Page Development; Twitter Account Management
• Blog – Update blog with postings…have many blogs for many years now.
• Survey Research – Research and email possible buyers for all the workplace research I’ve been gathering from this blog for four years now.  There are some buyer’s out there…just have to find them.

Retail

• Gift shop retail operation
• Cash register programming and operation
• Pricing items
• Maintaining inventory

Craft Design

• Base and back painting for artwork

Workshops

• Helping set-up for workshops
• Creating flyers
• Posting events on Facebook
• Posting events on Eventbrite

Reading Room

• Organizing Books
• Maintaining reading room

So, if I can get this help during the summer I will feel like the car (business) that I have on the road is better manufactured for the long haul and then I can hire one person to keep it running properly.  I can see that.

Life Style

• Expect not to get much sleep.  Just work around that for now.
• Walk. Not just for health reasons but for helping you plan and un-think.
• Eating Healthy. Actually forget eating and just juice, it’s easier and you get all the nutrients you need. There is no time to plan meals….ha…I think about the billionaire guy  I met and think he -was -on-to-something.

 

Church Easter Sunday

Not much has changed in Baptist churches since the last time I went in 2011.

People still want to shout and sing and feel grounded in the midst of the daily struggle.

It was interesting looking at everyone dressed-up in new clothes. Looking good. Feeling good. It was interesting. That made me happy to see that.

As I watched the person singing the song and people clapping at the end I wondered why this was considered worship.  I could see how the lady singing was worshipping, but not the people sitting in the pew listening and then clapping.  It was more like a concert to me.

When it was time for the collection of money, it was new to ask people who wanted to give electronically to go to the back of the room.  I guess they had credit and debit card terminals back there.

I don’t know.

I just sat there wondering, how did “the church” evolve into a theater performance, a concert, a retail operation, prayers that sounded like sermons…and…I guess there was a sermon, but I couldn’t stay any longer.  I just couldn’t. It felt awkward and unnatural because what I needed spiritually was already inside of me.  I left them in their beautiful new clothes, sitting side by side in straight back chairs, watching a t.v. screen showing the action on the stage and said silently…May they all be happy.

 

Just Quit = Letting Go

To JUST QUIT is Not the Same as Giving Up.  

It is Letting Go of What is Not Working.

Letting Go is the Opposite of Holding On

Below is a practical example of the difference between holding on and letting go:

• Look around and find something that is near to you and pick it up.
• Hold on to it REALLY TIGHT.  How does that feel? How do you feel holding on really tightly to whatever you picked up? Are you in any discomfort? Is there stress on your hand, or on your arm? Do you feel the tension?
• I know it hurts…so now…Let Go of It.

How did you Let Go of It?

You just DECIDED to Let Go.

Then what happened? You relaxed.

That is what Letting Go is all about

deciding to free yourself of what you are holding onto.

THE PROCESS and PRACTICE OF LETTING GO

There are so many things you can let go of that may be holding you back, causing you pain, making you unhappy, locking you down and limiting you. This list could include many things, such as;

• Thoughts
• Feelings
• Habits
• Desires
• Beliefs
• Staying Busy
• Stuff or Clutter
• Financial Decisions
• Holding Grudges
• Other People
• Jobs or Professions
• Failed Marriages
• Shopping, or
• A Faith That No Longer Serves You.

If you are new to Letting Go, then you may not know how to Let Go or Just Quit. You may not know how to pick one thing that you are doing, saying , believing that is now limiting you, making you uncomfortable, or causing you or others pain?

Below are some steps you can use to help you Learn to Let Go:

First DECIDE that you are going to start the process of Letting Go.  Just make a decision.

Start with something small like Letting Go of a Thought.

• Just pick a reoccurring thought that is not healthy or serving you.
• Maybe it’s a negative thought about yourself —  that runs like a record in your head.
• Your Just Quit Thing would be “I will Just Quit thinking (fill in the blank).
• “When I think that thought I will be aware of it and decide to let it go.”

From Thoughts you can Move on to Feelings.

Observe the feeling –

• Name it
• Own it
• Accept it, then understand that it is just a feeling and you can choose if you want to feel that way in this situation in your life.
• Regardless of the feeling you do not have to act on your feelings.
• You can feel it, acknowledge it and Let It Go.
• Just release it to the universe and decide that you will Let It Go. ” I will Just Quit acting on every feeling.”

You can then Move on to Letting Go of Desires.

• Think about the suffering and pain that “desires” have caused you.
• You know the drill: “Once I have a new house,  a new job, a new mate, get my degree, lose 20 pounds,  get out of this marriage, have surgery, make more money, get promoted, get out of debt,  retire from working, (feel in the blank);  then I’ll be happy.”
• You can live your entire life waiting to be happy.
• Just decide to be happy now with what you have and where you are.
• Have your goals and go for them, but be happy now.

Maybe you’re a pro at Letting Go.  You’ve been working on controlling your mind, thoughts, emotions and feelings and now you are ready to Let Go of Negative Habits (behavioural patterns of actions) such as:   “I will Just Quit Overeating, Overspending, Excessive Shopping, Not Exercising, Drinking, Smoking, Taking Drugs (legal and illegal, they are all drugs), Gambling, Watching Sexually Explicit Material, Procrastinating, ect”.  It more difficult to let go of habits, but it is possible and life changing.

The next thing to work on Letting Go of is Beliefs.

• Beliefs are things which have become part of your identity.
• These beliefs help you define who you think you are.
• They could be religious beliefs, beliefs about the world, beliefs about the environment, beliefs about others, beliefs about yourself, your friends, or your loved ones.
• A part of your life’s journey is about deciding what beliefs you should plug into.
• There are some beliefs that may have served you well at one point in your life, but not now.
• Beliefs change but sometimes are hard to let go of.    “I will Just Quit believing (fill in the blank).”

The final category is Letting Go of Yourself, as you know yourself.

• The self that thinks that it is separate and not connected to everyone and everything.
• Remember to begin with the end in mind… The End Results Model…one day “you” will not exist, not here, not as you know yourself.  You will die. You will then have to Let Go of Self.
• Don’t wait until you are dead to understand that life it about letting go…and you missed the point!
  

  “There’s an important difference

  between giving up and letting go.”

  ~Jessica Hatchigan~

 

The Richardson's Is Open For Business

No one could have told me what is was like to open a real business.  What it would take to open the door.  What it was like to have a soft opening. No one could have told me.

I have started many “businesses” but never one with a building.  This is different.  It’s real.

Maybe someone reading this might have started a business before but not with a building to open. When you do open a business that doesn’t have a building attached one of the first things you do is design and order business cards.  Let me say my business cards came in the day before we opened. It was one of the last things I had time to do.

Business Plans are great on paper but things don’t always go according to that plan. Things feel organic. You can plan all you want but when the rubber hits the road things don’t go according to plan.

We had a great opening weekend. Family and friends came out and supported us. Everyone loved the sign the we were told we could not put up. Don’t ever believe it when people tell you that you can’t do something…even if it is starting a business with a building.

Don't Believe The Hype...

 

See the above sign…I was told that I couldn’t get the letters off of it and even if I did get the letters off that it would then be hard to get the adhesive off and that the letters were probably so baked on it wasn’t worth the effort.

If you have a wooden sign with stick-on letters…don’t believe the hype.  Now it took me some research to figure it out, but figure it out I did.  It also took HOURS to get the letters, the adhesive and the imprint off, but it’s gone and ready for a new sign… THE RICHARDSON’S.

When opening a business as it is in life… if there is a will then there is a way.  

Don’t believe it when people tell you a bunch of hype. 

Keep moving forward.