Are You Working With Your Type of People? If Not, It's Time To Find Your Tribe.

A year after a former employer was acquired and a merger is complete, I have realized that these are just not “my people”. They do not do anything that I am proud of.

They do not “make” anything, only manipulate information. The subject matter bores me. My mind goes to a beach on an island or a hiking trail in the mountain within the first 30 seconds of every meeting.

I disagree with leaders in their approach in some aspects of business.

I am now behind the scenes, and client contact is what I always enjoyed, but the types of positions available are not what I was accustomed to in my former life.

I hate my work environment. Everybody works in the dark. It’s a dungeon and they seem to like it.

Sh*t rolls downhill, and it all collects in my department.

Worker Living In Florida

This is a plaque I made after reading this poll entry…

Sometimes all you have to do is find your tribe. 

Find the people you want to work with.

If you know that “these are just not my people” then it is a step in the right direction. Knowing that helps you find your tribe…your people…people that will help you fulfill your life’s work and vice versa.

You are reading from the book “Just Quit” & Live

Self Respect Means Knowing and Doing What Is Best For You

I’m tired of being taken advantage of and disrespected.

I’m tired of working my a** off for minimum wage and pouring my heart into a franchise I can’t change. Along with a penny pinching boss that defines cheap. (Broken furnace gets space heaters).

~Worker Living in CANADA  

Today I will show respect.  I will start with showing myself respect.

One of the universal truths; no matter who you are, where you were born, your race, your color or any other social factors is that ALL people want respect. They want to be treated with dignity and feel like they count.  The only problem is that not everyone knows or understands that universal truth.

You cannot respect others if you don’t respect yourself.

Just for this day respect yourself. Move through your day fully aware of your emotions (feelings) and your needs (physical, social, and emotional). It will start to amaze you as you focus on respecting yourself first and others second;  how the universe around you picks up on it and your outlook and situation starts to improve.

You are reading from the book “Just Quit” & Live

This Is Your Life, You Can Decide How To Live It.

I’m working for a narcissist. His sarcastic, rude comments are more than I can bear anymore. He repulses me.

I am depressed from having to deal with this individual.

I too have looked for another job without success.

I feel stuck and I want to “Just Quit”.

~Worker Living in Arkansas

When we work for people who we know are mentally ill it can be a challenge. It IS a challenge. We have to second guess our every move and endure needless verbal abuse…for what…a paycheck, health benefits, a job? 

We all know that everything changes, because it does. Eventually this situation will change as well. Although it might seem unbearable; it is bearable. It will change.

Until it changes we have to DECIDE what we can do to deal with it, with our boss and with this job. Remember we can DECIDE.  We have choices. We have to actively seek them out and we have to start taking actions.   

You are reading from the book “Just Quit” & Live

Grow From Your Situtation

I need to have TIME back – I hate feeling that the job is impossible and I am inadequate!

I’m in education – but the English system is too ridiculous I want to return to Ireland where I’m originally from and I want ME back.

~Worker Living in the UNITED KINGDOM

Who is “me”? Depending on how you look at it you might never get that “me” back again.

Even when you come out of your depression; or get out of this job; the “me” that you were before this is not the “me” that you should be after this.

Know that you are going to grow from this situation.

You are reading from the book “Just Quit” & Live

Stop Just Going Through The Motions...Why Were You Born?

I don’t like paperwork and my job is very boring. 

I can’t find myself and I don’t like spending most of my life doing this or being in this place.

~Worker Living in Switzerland

Finding yourself is the greatest gift that you can give the world. 

Discovering the reason that you were born and are in the world is what life is all about. 

If you are just going from day to day, going through the motions – STOP. You are here in the universe for a reason…only you can find out why…that’s why you’re here to play your part…find yourself…then give yourself, your gifts and your talents away to the world. 

You are reading from the book “Just Quit” & Live

Are You "Stepping In" To Fill A Role At Work? Maybe It's Time To Step Back.

I was hired as a Product Mgr. (PM) in a start up with a sound value proposition. I have responsibility to enhance it.

Part of my expectation is that I want to focus on PM, and I was told that they were hiring a VP of Eng. Although the title seemed too lofty, it satisfied my condition that there is a design execution counterpart to my role, so I can focus on the role I want to fulfill.

The Eng. Mgr. did not work out.  After three months of my happy period where I was delivering good work products (not results yet) for the team, I was thrusted into having to add engineering mgmt. to my role. I have the experience to do it, and I am doing it well. But it was not my intent.

Upon two reviews, my CEO advises that he does not want me to ‘help’ with engineering, be engineering or be PM, but don’t confuse the two. There has been a Programme Manager, who played some Eng. Mgr. role, but it was never clear to me what he did before my (and the eng mgr.) time. He is some sort of stakeholder, so I am unsure if he wants to lay back a bit, or has no interest to handle the engineering role, for which I became absorbed, but I was told I need to clarify my boundaries.

I can do the engineering mgr. role but it is not what I want to do – it was clear in my application process. They made a bad hire, and I stepped in to help. The CEO says I should ‘step in’, just do or not do. I don’t want to do the engineering job, but as a Product Manager, if engineering is weak, there is no product for me to manage and evangelize. So I am stuck.

The engineering challenges are large, with an aggressive agenda. 3+ products, each product having 3 modes of sensing, each sensing mode have to be developed. Each of these dimensions has their challenges. The company has resisted division of labour, and wants to remain in a ‘lab’ engineer environment. Each product x modes x sensing development has multiple deliveries within periods measured by months. All staff are multitasking to an extreme, while that is not appreciated, as there are often calls for people to focus.

Ultimately, many of these decisions are CEO/Founder driven. The company is mining technology, and the hiring process has not had many domain experts except for the CEO himself. I came from a FT50 company, whose domain is not mining, not relevant to be specific here. I am an operations guy with a career in Product Management (marketing) as well.

Where operations require suggestions for changes, I have found out from other senior managers that the CEO trumps decisions. You can’t say no to him, this is true for CTO, Programme Manager, and other senior managers. 

I can fight to change the culture, while facing looming deadlines, which will likely face further erosion of my confidence.

There has been resistance for me to directly interface with customers on key projects. While the resistance has relented, the initial reaction is to hold me back. I deal with customers and field projects well. When I do interact with them, it reminds me of the confidence I have in what I do.

After the background – there is founder-itis, and I am now doing more that I wanted to apply for 9 months ago rolling in Eng Mgr. and Prod Mgr. roles, with no increase in pay (they get a 2 for 1 deal), while I watch the senior managers not help even though they must have been doing this before my hiring. At the same time, the forward-looking promises are accelerating all in the name of preserving the runway. The CEO wants to do many things, not focus (“everything is critical”), so there are more hiring’s. More hiring requires more management, for which I have ‘stepped in’ but I am told not to. Someone must do the engineering management, or I do not have products to evangelize.

In the end, I am doing more that I applied for, not recognized for it, told that I shouldn’t do it (secretly, he just wants both done, and accountability, so there are no excuses), the risk of failure is high, and the promises are piling up. 

~Worker Living in CANADA

We can step into roles, tasks and duties that aren’t ours to do.

We can be used and used and used up. This is what happens to ‘good’ employees who want to ‘help’.

Before you ‘step in’ you should ‘step back’ and ask yourself WIIFM? What exactly is In It For You?

Somebody Cares About You...Don't Give Up...Hold On To HOPE

I have been off work from anxiety disorder and depression since July. I believe that the current (and continuing) environment is toxic and triggers my sensitivities to both disorders.

I have been on medication and to therapy since – I have the option to go back in January. However as much as I think I have changed, I don’t think that environment has improved.

While I think I could go back and handle the work, I think I would be very unhappy and it would start to deteriorate all the work I have put into my mental health over the past few months. In the meantime it’s holding me back from moving on and making plans for the future.

I could make it work at this job, but it would be a day to day struggle and I would have to work hard on how to manage the issues I have.

I would rather put that hard work and effort towards something more positive – toward furthering my abilities and career.

~Worker Living in CANADA

Today, just know that there are options. 

We can come up with options for our problems with this job.

If we need to get help then we need to get help. 

Sometimes just knowing that we can get help, helps.

Reach out today if you need to get professional help to deal with your anxiety or depression. Somebody cares.  Somebody cares about you and what you are going through.

P.S.

If you are thinking suicidal thoughts today because of your job tell somebody. Ask them to listen to you. Tell them you are struggling right now and just need to know that someone cares. There is a program called QPR (Question, Persuade, Refer) for people to help those who are suffering.  Your family may not know to outright ASK you the question…ARE YOUR THINKING ABOUT SUICIDE?  Consider this someone asking you the question.  Are You Thinking About Suicide Because Of Your Job?  If the answer is YES please tell someone, or call the Suicide Hotline in your country.

You will make it through this time. You will.  You will find a work situation that is right for you. Please talk to someone and get help so that your story continues and you can continue to contribute your essence to the universe.