Are You "Stepping In" To Fill A Role At Work? Maybe It's Time To Step Back.

I was hired as a Product Mgr. (PM) in a start up with a sound value proposition. I have responsibility to enhance it.

Part of my expectation is that I want to focus on PM, and I was told that they were hiring a VP of Eng. Although the title seemed too lofty, it satisfied my condition that there is a design execution counterpart to my role, so I can focus on the role I want to fulfill.

The Eng. Mgr. did not work out.  After three months of my happy period where I was delivering good work products (not results yet) for the team, I was thrusted into having to add engineering mgmt. to my role. I have the experience to do it, and I am doing it well. But it was not my intent.

Upon two reviews, my CEO advises that he does not want me to ‘help’ with engineering, be engineering or be PM, but don’t confuse the two. There has been a Programme Manager, who played some Eng. Mgr. role, but it was never clear to me what he did before my (and the eng mgr.) time. He is some sort of stakeholder, so I am unsure if he wants to lay back a bit, or has no interest to handle the engineering role, for which I became absorbed, but I was told I need to clarify my boundaries.

I can do the engineering mgr. role but it is not what I want to do – it was clear in my application process. They made a bad hire, and I stepped in to help. The CEO says I should ‘step in’, just do or not do. I don’t want to do the engineering job, but as a Product Manager, if engineering is weak, there is no product for me to manage and evangelize. So I am stuck.

The engineering challenges are large, with an aggressive agenda. 3+ products, each product having 3 modes of sensing, each sensing mode have to be developed. Each of these dimensions has their challenges. The company has resisted division of labour, and wants to remain in a ‘lab’ engineer environment. Each product x modes x sensing development has multiple deliveries within periods measured by months. All staff are multitasking to an extreme, while that is not appreciated, as there are often calls for people to focus.

Ultimately, many of these decisions are CEO/Founder driven. The company is mining technology, and the hiring process has not had many domain experts except for the CEO himself. I came from a FT50 company, whose domain is not mining, not relevant to be specific here. I am an operations guy with a career in Product Management (marketing) as well.

Where operations require suggestions for changes, I have found out from other senior managers that the CEO trumps decisions. You can’t say no to him, this is true for CTO, Programme Manager, and other senior managers. 

I can fight to change the culture, while facing looming deadlines, which will likely face further erosion of my confidence.

There has been resistance for me to directly interface with customers on key projects. While the resistance has relented, the initial reaction is to hold me back. I deal with customers and field projects well. When I do interact with them, it reminds me of the confidence I have in what I do.

After the background – there is founder-itis, and I am now doing more that I wanted to apply for 9 months ago rolling in Eng Mgr. and Prod Mgr. roles, with no increase in pay (they get a 2 for 1 deal), while I watch the senior managers not help even though they must have been doing this before my hiring. At the same time, the forward-looking promises are accelerating all in the name of preserving the runway. The CEO wants to do many things, not focus (“everything is critical”), so there are more hiring’s. More hiring requires more management, for which I have ‘stepped in’ but I am told not to. Someone must do the engineering management, or I do not have products to evangelize.

In the end, I am doing more that I applied for, not recognized for it, told that I shouldn’t do it (secretly, he just wants both done, and accountability, so there are no excuses), the risk of failure is high, and the promises are piling up. 

~Worker Living in CANADA

We can step into roles, tasks and duties that aren’t ours to do.

We can be used and used and used up. This is what happens to ‘good’ employees who want to ‘help’.

Before you ‘step in’ you should ‘step back’ and ask yourself WIIFM? What exactly is In It For You?

Somebody Cares About You...Don't Give Up...Hold On To HOPE

I have been off work from anxiety disorder and depression since July. I believe that the current (and continuing) environment is toxic and triggers my sensitivities to both disorders.

I have been on medication and to therapy since – I have the option to go back in January. However as much as I think I have changed, I don’t think that environment has improved.

While I think I could go back and handle the work, I think I would be very unhappy and it would start to deteriorate all the work I have put into my mental health over the past few months. In the meantime it’s holding me back from moving on and making plans for the future.

I could make it work at this job, but it would be a day to day struggle and I would have to work hard on how to manage the issues I have.

I would rather put that hard work and effort towards something more positive – toward furthering my abilities and career.

~Worker Living in CANADA

Today, just know that there are options. 

We can come up with options for our problems with this job.

If we need to get help then we need to get help. 

Sometimes just knowing that we can get help, helps.

Reach out today if you need to get professional help to deal with your anxiety or depression. Somebody cares.  Somebody cares about you and what you are going through.

P.S.

If you are thinking suicidal thoughts today because of your job tell somebody. Ask them to listen to you. Tell them you are struggling right now and just need to know that someone cares. There is a program called QPR (Question, Persuade, Refer) for people to help those who are suffering.  Your family may not know to outright ASK you the question…ARE YOUR THINKING ABOUT SUICIDE?  Consider this someone asking you the question.  Are You Thinking About Suicide Because Of Your Job?  If the answer is YES please tell someone, or call the Suicide Hotline in your country.

You will make it through this time. You will.  You will find a work situation that is right for you. Please talk to someone and get help so that your story continues and you can continue to contribute your essence to the universe.

Find A Hobby...Do Your Hobby...De-Stress

I’ve been at my job, a kitchen for eight years. I recently had an episode a month back, it felt like a heart attack. It was one of the scariest things I have ever felt. It happened again and again over the next few weeks.

I went to a heart doctor, and he said, there is nothing wrong with your heart. It’s stress, you’re having panic attacks he said. I have not felt normal for some time.

Every now and again, when I have time off, or am actively participating in my hobbies, and passions, I feel like my old self again.

But most days I just feel bad. It’s a horrible feeling that I would never wish on anyone. I don’t ever want to feel this way ever again.

I have strongly disliked my job for many years and have suffered problems related to stress because of it, but never this bad.  

It’s just too much and I can’t put myself thru it any more. 

~Worker Living in Florida

 

Sometimes all it takes is for us to lose ourselves in our hobbies.

They are our passions.

They allow us to de- stress.

They allow us to un-think.

They can pull us out of a deep depression.

Those hobbies can help us find our way, our path, and our plan.

Today, do your hobby or if you don’t have a hobby then go to a hobby store and walk around it and decide to try something that interest you…then…you’ll have a hobby.

Doors Of Opportunity Will Present Themselves…Even Without A Degree.

I’m depressed; there is no growth prospect. I’m not enjoying what I am doing and I’m working with stupid people.  I feel like I am getting no skills here and not improving myself. 

This job is actually stagnating me and making me unemployable. 

No matter how hard I work I will never be promoted because of my lack of education. I have tried to study but have no support and I am really interested in IT. 

Finding a new job in South Africa with our unemployment at 50+% will be hard but I can’t bear this job anymore.

~Worker Living in South Africa

If you know exactly what you want, then it’s already there waiting for you to come and get it.

Move towards what you know you want to do. 

Doors will open and opportunities will present themselves…even without a degree.

We Were BORN To Create…So Create Something Today

My job makes me miserable.  I’m not interested in the work at all. I feel so drained that I’ve stopped creating new things to sell in my Etsy business. It’s also damaging my outlook on life and relationships.

~Worker Living in United Kingdom

Don’t stop creating.

  If you can create ANYTHING (food, art, music, etc.) with your hands then do it today.

  Even if you don’t feel like doing it, still do it. 

We were BORN to create…so create something today.

What Do You Want? Name It. Identify It. You Already Have The Power.

I don’t like my workplace.

I don’t like management.

It’s not what I want to do at all.

It is thousands of kilometers away from the only thing that matters to me – my family.  I don’t like where I live and miss my culture.      

~Worker Living in Australia

There are some jobs that we have moved away from family, friends and our home country to pursue.  At first it can be exciting…new place…new city…new experiences… THEN…the lights come on and you see the mess that you are in.

It seems almost impossible to figure out how to get out of where you are. You just want to be able to go home…be like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz and click your heels three times and just go home.

Well, it might not be that easy, but that is a start.  To KNOW what you want to do.  Name it.  Identify it.  See it. You have to see it on the inside before it materializes on the outside. 

Focus on Energy. Research It. Understand It. Use It Wisely.

I dread waking up every morning and going to work.

Sunday nights are extremely depressing.

There hasn’t been any growth for me in more than a year.

I don’t get along with my boss.

I hate sitting in a cubicle.I hate crouching over a computer.I hate sitting under fluorescent lights.

I hate that my life is neglected because I have to go to work somewhere else and give all of my time and energy to a cause I no longer believe in.

~Worker Living in California

Our energy and our essence belongs to us. 

We can exchange our time for a salary, but our energy is ours. 

You can work on a project, or work retail, or fast food for that matter and give your time, mind and hands; but there is a life force that belongs to you. 

Today and everyday carve out time to focus on the energy that flows through your body.  If you feel it is depleted…ask for more energy.  There is an abundant supply of energy that comes from a Source outside of us.

Just ask: “Please give me an abundant supply of life force energy today.  I need it today to flow through my body and help me work on or towards causes that I believe in. Show me what I need to do to get more energy.”